Are you pregnant yet? When are you planning on having kids? Are you planning to have kids soon or are you just waiting to see if it happens now? Are you sure you're not pregnant? How much longer are you waiting to have kids?
Sometimes it takes an engagement, being with your partner for a certain amount of time, reaching a certain age, or just getting hitched. Maybe your best friend or a relative your age is trying to conceive or has just had a baby. Whatever the case, eventually the baby questions come.
Those questions up there? Exactly, word for word, some of the questions I've been asked. Once I did get pregnant though, it was as though I fell off the earth. Nobody cared anymore. There were some forced "congratulations" or further prying, but after I made the announcement, that was the last I heard from almost everybody.
However, before getting pregnant I wasn't exactly a celebrity. To make a long story short, let's just say I had a ton of problems in my family, and a lot of people decided that they didn't like me. I've since kept to myself and stayed out of everybody's way as much as I could. Still, at every possible chance, just about everyone was going crazy with baby questions.
Getting diagnosed with endometriosis didn't make it any easier. At the back of my mind was the thought of infertility looming over my future, but that wasn't something I wanted to explain to every Tom, Dick, and Harry that put their nose in my business.
Instead, when my hands, feet, and stomach swelled every few months and I developed a waddle, I would shyly explain to the women that it was "that time of the month" and just say I wasn't feeling well to the men. When my weakened immune system and anemia had me throwing up nearly daily for the past two years, I'd make the same excuses.
Then I'd come home and cry because even though we weren't ready yet, I wasn't sure if I would ever be able to have kids, especially by the time we were ready to start trying, and I knew I wanted kids
so bad. Everyone was just having kids as they pleased and I was trying to figure out the best time and get everything ready and hope and pray I was still fertile by then.
After my husband's heart attack and my own health issues, a baby was nowhere near our current plans. Imagine my surprise when two thick lines instantly popped up on my first pregnancy test! We excitedly called just about everyone we could think of and informed others via facebook.
The baby questions have gone away, sure, but so have all interested parties. Who's supposed to help me figure out what's going on with my body? (*flashback to puberty*) What happened to all those people that couldn't wait for me to get pregnant?
Fucking bitches.
I'm figuring this out as I go along. Some women have little to no pregnancy symptoms and can happily continue their daily lives without any changes. Some women, like me, are hit with the majority or all of the symptoms. Even the symptoms the books say only happen to 1% of women.
If you'd like to be surprised by pregnancy, or you'd like to keep thinking that a stork that farts rainbows delivers your baby to your doorstep, this is your warning. Stop reading. I am about to list, body part by body part and then some, exactly what pregnancy does to you. The majority, if not all of it, will
not be pleasant, cute, and giggly.
My intentions are not to scar you for life, but to help you realistically prepare for what may or may not happen to you or your loved one. Again, not all women experience these symptoms. Like I said, I'm figuring this out as I go along and this is what I've learned from my experience so far.
Hair - Some women experience changes in their hair. According to the books, your hair may become dry and frizzy, or thick and glossy. Mine has gone from dry, frizzy, and curly to extremely oily, wavy/almost straight, and falling out of my head every time I pass my hand through my hair. Also, I've noticed that my hair is going through a growth spurt and my
body hair grows at insanely fast speeds now. I used to shave my legs a few times a year and now I can't keep up with them! In lieu with the super-hair, I've also noticed I have a ton of ingrown hairs EVERYWHERE. I've never had this problem before, so I'm sure it's pregnancy related. It's even on my arms, which I don't shave/wax/do anything to at all.
Head - Headaches can be common, especially as pregnancy progresses past the first trimester. I usually suffer from migraines a few times a year, but now have them at least weekly. Also, since my second month of pregnancy, I've had extremely strong headaches a few times a week that last almost daily. As I am now bordering my fourth month, I wake up with very strong headaches daily, that usually last for as long as I'm awake.
Face - Acne is a common complaint. I personally don't have an acne problem, but I do have combination skin and usually wake up every day with a ridiculously oily nose. Since getting pregnant, my nose is now oily 24/7 and once my hair touches any part of my face, the rest of my face easily becomes oily as well. I have, however noticed a few very small bumps starting out along my forehead and chin. For the past week, I've been brushing some loose face powder very lightly over my face and neck to counter the oiliness (and make me feel pretty when mood swings get me down) and so far, the bumps have been going down and have almost cleared up completely. Also, a popular old wives tale predicts that if mom-to-be puts on a lot of face weight, baby will be a girl. My sister-in-law quickly got puffy, almost sagging cheeks and what appeared to be starting out as a double chin in her first trimester. (I know that's not nice to say but if you met her, you'd find worse things to say, trust me) I correctly predicted she was having a girl. Bear in mind, it's just an old wives tale/superstition. I just think they're fun to look out for. Personally, I've lost about ten pounds since becoming pregnant and my cheeks look sunken.
Eyes - Blurred vision hits some preggos, but the books say it's usually linked to pre-gestational diabetes or preeclampsia. I've had this problem just a few times so far, (and I'm sure it's not my astigmatism) and my blood pressure (bp) and sugar are fine. If you have
allergies, be on the look out for hyped up reactions to your allergens. My dust and pollen allergies have me sneezing constantly, my sinuses act up daily, my eyes are frequently itchy, burning, and watery, and rashes break out faster and spread wider now. Try to avoid your allergy triggers if you can, as I don't think there are any allergy medications approved for pregnant women.
Nose - The books mention nosebleeds occurring more frequently because of increased blood flow or something. I haven't had this problem so far, though I normally don't have a problem with nosebleeds. My nose ranges between being stuffy and so dry it hurts to breathe in. When my nose is that dry, (TMI warning) the only relief for me is to pick it, and try to blow out anything I can. Sometimes I pick too much or blow too hard and get some dried, bloody mucus, which my doc assures me is normal. Also, I've noticed that every time I throw up my nose becomes incredibly runny. Stuffy noses and congestion are also common symptoms. I almost forgot to include this, but a heightened sense of smell is a helluva big deal! (Happens to 1% of women my ass!) I smell everything the neighbors cook and can't leave the house without a bandanna to put over my nose in case I pick up on a certain smell. Some smells may trigger nausea. For me, the main culprits are oil, onion, garlic, and anything being cooked. However, during my second month, my nausea was so bad I kept a bottle of limacol (similar to bay rum) at my side at all times because absolutely EVERYTHING I smelled made me sick. Now though, I love the smell of powdered detergent. Everything else is either bearable, not bad, or absolutely disgusting.
Mouth - The books say that during pregnancy, your gums may be prone to bleeding or swelling more easily and recommend getting at least one dental check up to make sure your teeth and gums are healthy during your pregnancy. I'm guessing morning sickness and eating more frequently also affect your teeth and just add to the reasons why you should get a check up. I have two wisdom teeth growing out, so those hurt occasionally, and sometimes either side of my mouth will become extremely sensitive and may hurt if I bite on something tough or hard. I haven't had any bleeding, but I did have some slight swelling for a week or so during my second month. Another big deal for me has been my taste buds. I don't know what those guys are smoking, but everything tastes funny. And with my morning sickness, once it tastes funny, it can't stay in my stomach. So far I've had to give up anything with chocolate in it, as well as water. In my second month, anything dairy was equally disgusting, although I've been able to drink vanilla ensure, for the past two weeks I've been living on sandwiches that include cheese, and I had a strawberry nutrament today. Yet another big deal for me has been the increase in my saliva production. One of my books says this only happens to 1% of women, the other book doesn't even mention it. Not only have I been drooling since the beginning of my pregnancy, but I can't stand the taste of my own saliva. Until just recently, if I swallowed any of my saliva I would throw up. I can now stomach my own spit, but too much, and BAM! Instant sickness. The second the taste of a food or drink is out of my mouth and I get a water-y saliva taste in my mouth, I have to start looking for something to sip or snack on to keep myself from throwing up. Among my intolerances are now toothpaste and anything remotely minty. I now use one of the baking soda toothpastes just fine, and add water to my mouthwash. However, immediately after brushing my teeth, I have to keep spitting until I make my breakfast sandwich or get my iced tea to drink to get the mouthwash taste out of my mouth.
Lips - I haven't read anything about lip changes yet, but personally, since I've gotten pregnant, my lips are now a bit swollen and dry up and painfully chap very easily. My favorite blistex and chapsticks all make me sick now, but I've found a tolerance in lipstick. I just use one of my glossiest lipsticks and reapply as needed. If I forget to reapply, my lips instantly dry up, chap, and bleed. I also exfoliate my lips with a wet washcloth and my fingers in the shower daily to cut down on the dry, chapped skin that hardens and increases bleeding if accidentally tugged on.
Skin - Many women experience stretch marks due to extreme weight changes in pregnancy (or so the internet says). From my research, leaving skin dry and scratching can either worsen stretch marks or make you more prone to them. Also, stretch marks are thought to be hereditary i.e. if your mother or sister had them, so would you. Almost everyone in my family has stretch marks. I developed my own in my teens after bouts of skeletal sicknesses and weight gain. I can't help but scratch my itches :( but I do try to remember to apply cocoa butter (at least for the past few weeks) every night. I'll let you know how it works out. Again, acne can be a problem. Until a few weeks ago, I had a re-occurrence of my childhood eczema. This time it came back in the middle of my upper back. In addition to my red, flaky, dry dragon scales, I also developed dry, flaky, white patches on my shoulders, upper arms, and chest. Applying regular skin cream (I use Jergen's Sensitive Skin Relief, hypoallergenic and fragrance free) daily eventually helped both problems. Again, your allergies may act up easier than is the norm, so if you normally have allergic reactions on your skin, be wary. Also, with my super-nose I can't use anything that smells too strong, which includes soap. My husband reminded me today that one reason I switched soaps is because I complained the soap we were using was hurting my already sensitive skin. My biggest problem though, was that I could suddenly smell the soap from a mile away, and it smelled so strong it made me gag until I threw up. We were using Irish Spring (no offense Irish Spring people) and I'm now using Palmolive brown sugar & oats exfoliating soap. I soap myself up quickly and use a mesh sponge to scrub afterwards. It works better than bodywash :). Another soap that worked great for me was called Ivory I think. We bought it in bulk for cheap last year, the bars are white and rectangular, once you start using them they break easily after a while, but the scent is so light it was perfect for my pregnancy nose!
Neck - In addition to headaches, I almost always have neck pain now. I can't lie down or sit up in one position for too long. Sleeping is also a challenge (we'll get to that) and failing to prop my head up properly will result in either a stiff neck or just a really painful one. This also makes watching TV shows or movies a pain, but I can easily give myself a neck and shoulder rub at any time. Personally, using an icy hot gel helps a lot, especially because there's practically no scent.
Chest - It's common for preggos to feel their heart beating faster than normal with all the extra work the heart is doing for both mom and baby. Personally, with my anemia, my heart normally has to work twice as hard so I often feel like my heart is rolling around in my chest and trying to jump out. If it gets really bad, I'll have shortness of breath and I may black out. With four fainting episodes this year already (one while pregnant), now that I'm pregnant, the second I feel like I'm becoming aware of my heartbeat, I stop what I'm doing and either sit with my head in my lap or lie down with my feet elevated and take deep breaths and just try to relax until it's back to normal. So far my doc says we'll have to wait until I'm well enough to do my next set of bloodwork to confirm if my anemia is affecting the pregnancy, and I haven't read anything on helping with the rapid heartbeat thing, but that's what works for me. I've also had a chest cold since I got pregnant. I'm not sure if this is a common symptom, but since pregnancy weakens your immune system so that your body doesn't attack the growing fetus, it might be a good idea to stock up on some fruits rich in vitamin C to keep as much sickness away as possible. I almost forgot this one, but be prepared for heartburn. I was shocked to experience it and only recently heard from another pregnant woman that she also experienced it. She says it won't go away so she just deals with it. I must be a big baby because I can't just deal with it lol. My heartburn gets so bad I eventually throw up. Antacids haven't worked for me and I'm terrified of using medications or anything other than prenatals while I'm pregnant so I'm not even going to experiment with anything else. I have noticed however, that cold cucumbers with a little salt kept the heartburn at bay for nearly an hour and prevented it from hitting me full strength. So far, I've identified oil, onion, garlic, pepper, and green seasoning as my triggers, so I avoid them like the plague. That's working out pretty well so far, although I am getting tired of sandwiches. If anything changes with this apparently common symptom, I'll let you know.
Boobs - One of the first things I noticed that made me think about doing a pregnancy test was the difference in my boobs. Since I got married, my DD's had been shrinking. A couple weeks into my pregnancy (before we knew), my bras fit like really big coconut shells on boobs that were down to a B/C with
stretch marks on them. Within a couple weeks, my boobs had filled back out and were totally rocking their DD bras again. Not only were they filled out, but they were perky. Like porn-star perky. To top that off, my nipples became ridiculously sensitive, started to get darker, and were constantly pointy. Sure, the boobs coming back meant chronic upper back pain again, but until your boobs have shrunk down a few sizes and you get them back, I don't think you'll understand how amazing it is. Hubby loved them, but I could not keep my hands off my own boobs. I kept playing with them and poking them and looking at them and I was just so happy to have my girls back :). I'm now around month four, and according to my pregnancy journal, my boobs have grown by an inch and a half. Despite the slight growth, I can still wear my old bras as long as I unbuckle them whenever my chest feels constricted. As long as I'm staying home, I'll wear a tight vest and fold it half-way up over my boobs instead of a bra whenever possible. My nipples have continued to darken, as have my areolas and both now have a purplish tinge. I've also noticed that my areolas have grown. By "noticed" I mean just last night I realized that a mole I had on one of my boobs has been devoured by one of my areolas. Also, if I'm wearing a bra with padding and my boobs shift ever so slightly, it's an instant areola show. It's also common to experience sore, heavy breasts. During my first trimester, after my initial fascination with having my girls back, my breasts became so heavy and sore that I couldn't bear to touch them. I stayed home as often as possible and propped them up with pillows. Whenever hubby and I went out, I would recline the front seat in the car and lie back. If we ate at any restaurants, I would slouch forward so I could rest my breasts on the counter lol. To help with the painful sensitivity and stiffness of my nipples, I carefully rub cocoa butter on them at night (a huge difference in my opinion). I've read a lot about women using bra extenders to use their old bras as much as possible before having to buy maternity/nursing bras. Bra extenders aren't available where I live, but I'm trying to go as long as I can before bra shopping so I don't end up buying a bunch of different sizes in a short space of time. After importing and taxes, bras are usually upwards of $200 down here, and my size isn't an easy one to find, even more so if I'm getting bigger. Conversely, many women have noted that buying maternity/nursing bras as your boobs grow with your pregnancy can be good for after baby arrives as your boobs may return close to their normal size if not go back down to their pre-pregnant size completely, so in that case, the more bra shopping you do now, the more options you have then. It's completely up to you.
Back - Back pain is a common pregnancy complaint. Usually, this lower back pain occurs as the uterus expands and added weight from your baby bump is stressed on your back. If your boobs are on the big side or are heading that way, you may find that you also have upper back pain as well. Standing and sitting up straight helps somewhat for me. Sometimes I place my hands on my hips, and use my thumbs to massage my back as I bring my hands higher and higher. When I can't go any higher, I stretch an arm behind my arm and take turns trying to rub. Certain yoga moves also help A LOT, but always check with your doctor before starting any exercise routine. Even after doing yoga for many years myself, I'm currently doing research to be 100% sure of prenatal yoga that is 100% safe. Also, remember you're growing a person inside of you, and that entitles you to get some special treatment. Ask your partner, family member, or a friend to give you a gentle rub if you can't go to a professional with experience with pregnant women. Again, remember to ask your doctor first. When my aunt was pregnant with her son, as an inexperienced teen I massaged her with a special rub every day until nearly birth. Personally, I'm terrified of getting a massage while pregnant for inexplicable reasons really, so I just give myself a little rub here and there as described above, and only when I feel like I could really use a massage (and pampering) I'll ask hubby to give me a quick one while I'm sitting up. My doc says massages are fine, but I don't want to hear it. Honestly though, just go with what your doc says and what your gut tells you is okay lol.
Stomach - Indigestion. Heartburn. Morning/noon/night/midnight sickness. Bloating. Acid reflux. The list could go on. These are just what I'm aware of due to my experiences (minus the acid reflux I think). One thing I've learned is that you absolutely NEED to eat small, frequent meals and hydrate yourself throughout the day. It's the only way to calm/stop these things. Your stomach naturally has acid (think back to high school science class: hydrochloric acid?) in it. I'm not sure what it's made of and how it's formed and all that, but I've learned that if you're throwing up a lot and not eating and drinking enough, you're making your stomach unsettled and that acid will make your life hell. I didn't know I was pregnant until I was about 7 weeks in. This was around the middle of July. By then, I was as cool as a cucumber, just chilling out with my porn star boobs and a baby in my belly. Then August, month two, came in. BAM! Say hello to every single pregnancy nightmare imaginable. All of a sudden, I was throwing up 10-15 times DAILY. You'll realize by reading through this post that the majority of my symptoms, if not all, really came and smacked me silly in my second month of pregnancy. But my vomiting made me lose a total of ten pounds and left me so weak and miserable I was actually brought to tears a few times, praying and begging for it to stop. I felt like if I was hit with the Bubonic Plague, and here I was, dying. When I wasn't throwing up every single thing I tried to eat or drink, I was throwing up nasty stomach acid. By the third month, I cut down to vomiting 8-10 times a day. By the middle of the third month it was 1-3, and now, at the doorstep of my fourth month, it's 1-2 times a day, and that's when it happens, as it's not daily anymore. Grilled wholewheat sandwiches with a slice of vegetarian bacon ham, a slice of low-fat cheese, and some ketchup has been my savior. My last blog post will tell you that I have these sandwiches every 2-3 hours. If I don't eat every 2-3 hours, I will feel faint and throw up. Also, since water makes me sick now, I try to keep myself hydrated by making jugs of iced tea, buying cranberry flavored grapefruit juice, or half-freezing cranberry juice. Whatever it is I drink, I drink a lot of it and I dilute it with two-three large blocks of ice per glass, which is usually melted by the time I've sipped away my drink. On average, I'd say I drink close to two liters a day, and some days, close to three, which my doc says is good, although she's still hoping I'll be able to stomach water and other clear fluids soon. My doc has also recommended drinking milk to soothe my stomach, which I wasn't able to stomach until my third month. Even though I still throw up, increasing my fluids was the best idea ever. When I was throwing up so bad I could barely eat, throwing up actually hurt my stomach, chest, and throat so much I would cry sometimes. Now that I'm drinking so much liquid, if I do happen to throw up, it's mostly liquid, which means it's much easier coming up and it doesn't hurt, which I am immensely grateful for. I've already covered heartburn under "chest". As for indigestion, if you know it's not sitting well in your stomach and it's gonna come back up, I've found that it's best to chug some icy cold liquids and just wait for it to come back up. The more things I try to send into my stomach at that time is the longer I'm miserable for, but as I've said, the liquids help with the throwing up part. Before getting pregnant, everything I drank was at room temperature. However, now everything I drink is icy cold and has ice in it. I've also found that this helps if food leaves an aftertaste in my mouth or is taking particularly long to settle down in my stomach. As for the sickness, BELIEVE ME, eating and drinking helps. My dad texted me and told me I needed to eat a lot, but I figured that's what everybody says to pregnant women, right? You have to eat for the baby, sure, but there's no way he understands how this feels. Since I've started eating those sandwiches at close intervals, it's made a world of a difference. Also, if you're eating and you feel full, STOP EATING. It doesn't matter if you normally have a certain amount all the time. You're pregnant now. This is different. Over-eating when you're already full actually makes me throw up now (and trust me, I over-ate when I was full A LOT before getting pregnant). Even with my sandwiches, sometimes I'm struggling halfway through. I just make sure to take sips of whatever I'm drinking and relax until I'm ready to eat again. As for bloating, I haven't found any remedies for that big belly feeling, but if I need to burp or fart, I do it. I was shocked at my burping initially, and tried to burp quietly. Trying to control my burps, and also the excessive burping itself initially made me throw up more. Now I just burp as loud or as little as my body needs to. Some women have a bigger problem with flatulence. I've farted probably four or five times since getting pregnant. I guess burping is where my gas goes really. But give yourself a break. You're growing a person inside you. I can't offer any tips on acid reflux or anything else as my experiences haven't gone past what I've covered so far. Vomiting is a common symptom with pregnancy, but if you're throwing up too much like I was, you may have
hyperemesis gravidarum. This basically means your nausea and vomiting are so bad it can lead to problems such as dehydration and prevent you and baby from getting the nutrition you both need. I was told by everyone I spoke to that throwing up happens to everybody, and throwing up 15-20 times a day was "normal" and I just needed to suck it up and deal with it. I felt that it wasn't though, and despite everyone shrugging it off as nothing, I insisted that my doctor hear my detailed notes in my pregnancy journal describing the severity of the problem. Once she heard what I had to say, she immediately started a series of treatments to try to stop the vomiting and my weight loss became her biggest concern. Having been on IV fluids for two months before my first visit due to other illnesses, I really didn't want to go back on them again and for some reason my doctor just never mentioned it. Personally, none of the things we tried stopped the vomiting. It eventually eased up on its own. Regardless, if you feel that something isn't right, talk to your doctor. If your doctor isn't listening, keep talking anyway and
be persistent until he/she stops talking and hears you out. You're not only responsible for your own health, but now baby's health is in your hands too.
Upper abdomen - I'm not sure if this happens to all women, but throughout my first trimester I couldn't have anything that tied, wrapped, scrunched, or came into any kind of squeezing contact with my upper abdomen. Any dresses or blouses that tied at the back had to be left untied otherwise I'd throw up or feel extremely nauseous. Even now, I slouch as I type because the keyboard is on the bed, and my bra band is buckled and resting on my stomach. I'll only feel relief when I unbuckle my bra and sit straight up and lean into a pillow placed upright against the bedhead or lie down and prop my boobs up on a pillow to keep them off the area. If it persists, I'll stop what I'm doing and relax or try to distract myself until it passes. For some women, their bumps can start from higher up, often right below their boobs or at the rib-cage. There's another old wives tale that predicts a girl if you carry high, wide, and round, and a boy if you carry low, narrow, and pointed. I've never been wrong using this method to guess a baby's gender. I'd like to play along but my bump hasn't shown up yet lol.
Lower abdomen - Expect some lower abdominal pain as the uterus expands and prepares itself to be baby's home. I get a lot of pain on my lower left side, but I'm not sure if this is round ligament pain. From what I've read, round ligaments stretch, shift, and loosen up as they prepare themselves for the weight of baby and the growing uterus. This can often be painful. Women have suggested walking, stretching out the joints, and swaying the hips side to side as methods to ease the pain. I'm usually sitting down when it happens, so I just wait for it to pass. For some women, their bumps may be focused more low down. When mine starts showing I'll let you know. The famous linea nigra may also start between your first and second trimester. This is a dark vertical line that forms in the middle of the abdomen, usually from the pubic bone to the navel. However, I've seen some women with a line running from the top to the bottom of their abdomen. Also, this is where you may feel baby's first movements before the kicking starts. Since the very beginning of my third month I've been feeling my baby moving. Personally, I think it feels more like when your heart skips a beat, just low down in your tummy. It's usually described as fluttering in the books/online. My doc says by around my 20th week I should start feeling kicks. Just so you know, I had read that feeling the baby's first movements doesn't occur until weeks 14-16. I started feeling him/her moving around week 12 and even though I read that moms-to-be mistake gas for the movements, I was sure it was my baby. I saw my doc at week 14 and she confirmed my suspicions. Sometimes you just know :). I'm guessing when the kicks start, they'll be felt down here too, but when it happens I'll edit and let you know.
Lady parts - I've read that your lady parts may begin to take on a reddish, purplish hue as more blood is flowing in that area with baby so close by. I don't regularly take my head off and look down there (or check it with a handheld mirror) so I'm not sure if this is happening to me. I did use a handheld mirror at the beginning of my second month and I actually saw the vaginal discharge coming out, though. Oh, increased vaginal discharge is another one. For my first month it was so icky and uncomfortable I thought something was wrong with me. I had no clue this was a symptom so when I went to my general doctor to confirm my pregnancy, I also asked for something to fix what was going on down there. At my first OB-GYN visit, my doc asked if I had experienced any discharge and I immediately started complaining about it. She stopped me from the vaginal inserts my general doctor had prescribed and assured me this was normal. I'm now kind of used to it, but it's still annoying. A word of advice: never stop using panyliners, always keep extra pantyliners on hand, change/wipe/shower whenever you think you should, and keep down there very closely trimmed, if not hairless around that particular area. I usually trim for hygiene purposes or when I feel like it because neither hubby nor I have a preference there, but non-stop discharge on pubes is not fun ladies. Not fun at all. Also, I'm not sure if this is a symptom or if it's just me, but I feel like my lady parts have gotten....well....bigger. I've always felt particularly small down there, especially as I married hubby when I was a virgin and we've only been married for two years, but now I feel noticeably bigger. Maybe it's just me. I asked hubby to inspect me and tell me if he noticed anything different. The darling still isn't sure what he's supposed to be looking for in particular. When I find the handheld mirror again, I'll see for myself.
Bladder - Frequent urination is one symptom that gets over-rated in some movies and books with pregnant characters (harlequin anyone?). I've had certain days where I need to pee every few hours, but normally, this hasn't been an issue for me yet. Maybe when my bump starts showing and my uterus is bigger and pressing down on my bladder more, I'll feel it. However, I have noticed some urinary incontinence every time I throw up. A couple weeks ago it was so bad I freaked out thinking my water broke early. When this happens, I just feel a little or a lot of fluid coming down between my legs. I have no control over it. This is a huge problem for me because I've always prided myself on my bladder control and now I never go without a pantyliner and I keep a sanitary pad and extra underwear in my purse just in case. *embarrassed much*
Rear end - Some women get bigger butts while preggo. I gained two inches at first, but my morning sickness weight loss has since not only shrunk my already small behind back to normal, but it's also very flabby now and feels like just skin and bone. I'm told quite often by hubby and have been told by girlfriends that I have a very bone-y butt. Normally, if I sit down for like a couple hours or so, it hurts (I'm guessing because of the bone and my lack of cushion). Now, if I sit down for five - ten minutes I need to shift my weight or I'll end up massaging my butt shortly after.
Bowel movements - Some women have hemmorhoids or piles as a result of constipation. My only problem has been either constipation (one bowel movement per week) or explosive diarrhea (at least once a day, every day). For some reason though, once I have diarrhea, my vomiting is cut down tremendously. Using whole wheat, whole grain, multi grain, or bran products whenever possible helps to keep me regular, but sometimes my bowel has a mind of it's own. My doc has suggested metamucil, but my diarrhea has since come back so I haven't tried it yet.
Legs - In the first trimester I had a problem where my legs got very tingly, painful, and numb. I elevated my feet whenever I sat down or laid down and I haven't had the problem since the beginning of my third month. I do, however, still get numb arms, legs, hands, and feet very easily. I lower the area and wiggle my fingers or toes until the feeling comes back and shake out either my arms or legs. I was told by my grandmother to elevate my feet as often as possible to prevent varicose veins. I've had varicose veins since I was in my early teens, so I guess I'll be looking out to see if there are any new ones. Also, because of my existing health problems, I get light-headed and dizzy very often, so I do try to lie down or put my head down or elevate my feet when I can to prevent fainting. I've read about women getting extremely bad leg cramps as well. I haven't experienced this myself, but I've read that massaging and stretching out the leg with toes pointed to the ceiling helps.
Feet - I have what's called "fallen arches" and I normally experience pain underneath my feet. However, since becoming pregnant I've noticed that my feet hurt a lot easier now and can hurt so bad that sometimes I need to take my shoes off and sit down (whether it's the grocery, mall, etc). Resting and staying off my feet usually helps. If not, I massage my feet until it feels better. Swollen hands and feet are a common symptom and are often associated with preeclampsia. I haven't had this problem so far, but if you do, inform your doctor right away.
Sleeping - I'm now easily tired and frequently sleepy. Yet, even after investing in a body pillow, sleeping is now a job. Preggos can only sleep on either their left or right side. It's recommended that you sleep on your left side more, as there's better blood flow and other important things, and personally, the left side is more comfortable for me than the right. My problem with sleeping is that I toss and turn A LOT. I wake up every half hour or so and I have to turn because my arms or legs get numb so much easier now, they're now completely numb every time I wake up. I shake them out and try to get back to sleep, and do this all night long. The thing with tossing and turning is that I wake up and sometimes I'm on my back or lying on my belly *gasp*. Those are big no-no's. I wake up so scared that I've done something to the baby I actually prevent myself from falling back asleep. Sometimes I'm just so exhausted I actually go back to sleep exactly as I've woken up, on my back or belly and when I wake up with sense in my head I freak the hell out. Putting a pillow or folded blanket on either side of me helps when it can. By "helps when it can" I mean when I turn as I'm sleeping, I turn on top of the pillow or blanket or towel or whatever I put there and it prevents me from lying flat on my back or belly. However, I kick and push things away as I sleep so they usually end up on the ground which sucks when it comes to doing laundry. One thing that helps though, is snuggling up to hubby. I don't know how the hell this happened, but once hubby and I got married I almost instantly formed this habit of inching my way across the bed and snuggling up to him (even while I'm sound asleep) and throwing my arm and leg over him. According to him, it's the arm/leg of death and he can't move and it traps him so that if I get really angry I can kill him one day, but I think it's cute :). Anyway, since becoming preggo, it's usually the only way I can get comfortable enough to sleep unless I'm sprawled across the entire bed to toss and turn and throw everything on the floor. Also, my head needs to be propped up a certain way or I wake up with really bad neck, shoulder, arm, and back pain.
Body heat - I thought this was just a funny movie thing from Father of the Bride II, but as it turns out, it's real. I went from walking everywhere with a jacket because I was always cold, to not wanting to go anywhere and just sitting naked in front of two fans in the bedroom, splashing ice cold water on myself, whining about wanting air conditioning and a tub full of ice. The heat gets so bad it rivals my endo hot flashes and if I don't stop what I'm doing and try to cool myself down, there's a huge chance I'll faint. I get so hot that I get weak and collapse on myself and I need hubby to help me get from one place to another as I struggle to breathe in and out. Word of advice: get a fucking air conditioning unit. You can thank me later.
Mood swings - You may have offended or upset a pregnant woman and faced her wrath. If not, consider yourself lucky. Personally, my mood swings so far have been so ecstatically happy and a hyper that hubby checks my juice to make sure thee's nothing in it; missing my dad, brothers, or other loved ones, or thinking about how much I love my dog or husband or this baby and crying hysterically as if it's the end of the world; or worrying incessantly and freaking myself out with stress until I get so bothered that I actually throw up. When my sister-in-law was pregnant with her daughter, every few days she would scream, yell, stomp her feet, and throw little tantrums over little things like our bedroom light being on or a fly coming into the house. She normally thinks she's some kind of God but pregnancy took her ego and behavior to a whole 'nother level. The pregnancy hormones can mess with your emotions, sure, but don't abuse your power just because you're pregnant. Try to be as understanding as you can of the people around you that have to deal with many changes you may not have noticed for the duration of your pregnancy. If you have to cry, let it out. If you're getting frustrated, try to sit down and talk about your problem with your partner, relatives, or friends. Every day, hubby and I sit down and talk about how I feel and what I have on my mind. Sometimes I still get bothered by a lot of things, but I try to talk it out every chance I get.
Eating habits - As I've stated in the "stomach" section; smaller, frequent meals and constant hydration is your best friend. You may find that your taste buds change a bit during pregnancy as well. As a former chocoholic, I can no longer stand the scent or taste of anything remotely chocolate-y. You may find that certain things you would have never tried before pregnancy are now appealing to you. All I can suggest is a lot of experimentation. Sometimes you don't know what you'll like or dislike until you try it.
People's reactions - One thing I've learned for sure is that people can be mega douches. I get pissed every time someone who normally ignores me suddenly pops into my life demanding a belly picture or info on the baby. Personally, I've been observing just who is there for me during times like these and who is just poking their nose just to get some gossip or mind my business. I've decided that I'm ignoring the nosy bitches and if any of them show up on my doorstep demanding to see my belly or baby, fuck them. I want to raise my baby to have self-respect and not go running to fall at anyone's feet when they realize you suddenly exist once every two - ten years. I deserve better than that, and so does my baby. But that's just my personal take on things. I've never been a like-able person in my family, but after nagging baby questions since getting married, I happily shared the news of my pregnancy with as many relatives as I could. Some of them were very rude, some offered a quick word of congratulations and promptly ended the call/conversation, and some just wanted to know how far along I was or kept asking for belly pictures. There was no concern for mine or the baby's health, no kindly words to share in my joy, etc. Others just focused on themselves and ignored my news completely. I've also lost a few friends since becoming pregnant. There were facebook statuses, certain statements, and frequent jokes that were very anti-pregnancy and anti-baby until these people stopped talking to me completely. Others asked for information I wasn't ready to divulge and gradually cut me off. Whatever the reason, you may notice some people acting strangely. I'm giving everyone the space they need to get over whatever it is they're going through, but I will not be anyone's doormat. If I think someone is being inappropriate, rude, or I'm not comfortable with the way they're acting, I will either blatantly say so or keep my distance. These are not the people I want around me while I'm (quite confusingly) trying to figure out all these changes on my own, nor are they the people I want around my helpless newborn when he/she is born. As a mom-to-be, I believe it's my prerogative to make these decisions and to have those decisions respected.
Pregnancy brain - I thought this was just a filler episode from How I Met Your Mother, but sadly, it's a real symptom. I'm actually afraid to talk to my friends on the phone because I forget what I'm saying mid-sentence or end up saying many made-up words that make no sense. I also have a lot of typos that I overlook now. Sometimes, it's as simple as forgetting what I'm about to say or do. Sometimes I can't remember the meaning of a simple word or I jumble up my words so badly I scare myself. Sometimes I just do stupid things. Last week I filled my cup with ice, clamped the lid on, and stuck my straw in. I sat down in the back porch and put the straw to my mouth and started to sip before I realized there was nothing but ice in my cup! Yesterday I dabbed on some lipstick, took off my glasses, and lightly dusted my face with some loose face powder. I then put my glasses on and tied up my hair. As I was returning my make-up to my purse, I realized my hair was still swinging freely around my face and I had never opened the container of face powder! I've tried to deny this symptom for as long as I could, but it's a real symptom, and it's one I battle daily lol.
That's all for now.
These are just the things I've experienced so far. As my pregnancy progresses I'll keep you guys updated with what else I learn. Just focus on keeping you and and your little one healthy and happy. Some symptoms may be annoying or unpleasant to say the very least, but I'm sure once you're holding your little bundle in your arms it will all be worth it!
